Monday, 27 February 2017

Shoehorn at the ready...


Wednesday will soon be here and in a bid to be organised I have decided to sort my kit bag. Make sure I have all I need. Be ready (I also need to check for half eaten, abandoned granola bars that are un-revivable). This was a job that should have taken all of ten minutes, but unfortunately has come to an abrupt halt as soon as it's even begun. Number one on my list is swimming costume; the most obvious and some might say important piece of kit, well it certainly is at my pool, where skinny dipping is frowned upon. I got it out of the drawer, took one look at it and could have wept, for someone has snuck into my house and swapped my costume for one that is for a child! I feel quite sick looking at it. It's tiny! Was it even mine? The last thing I want is to arrive at the pool and try and shoehorn myself in whilst I'm there, so there's nothing else for it - I need to try it on... today. Check the elastic has enough give in it. So here I am, it's now late afternoon, and I'm still looking for excuses to not do it. I've persuaded my mum to take me for a coffee (I'm still not driving), cleaned out a drawer, organised my daughter's shoes in colour order, checked 1,000 CD's match their cases and finally researched sugar free snacks for swimming, in anticipation of the impending news that I need to basically stop eating. It's either that or chicken wire. So excuses used up, and armed with a crowbar and Fire and Rescue on speed dial, its now or never (right now I'd take never)...

Some time later...

Let's just say that I am thanking my lucky stars that Speedo are very generous with the amount of elastic they use in their costumes, and I'm currently putting together a list of ingredients so I can hot foot it (I wish!) to the supermarket in the morning. This will be followed by a stint in the kitchen attempting to make some of Davina's sugar free fruit flapjacks. Nuff said?

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