Pool Water Woman - for the time being...

At the end of the summer swim season last year, swim buddy and I were chatting about ultimate swim challenges we would love to do. She also informed me that we needed do them soon “before we get too old and things started dropping off…” I declared that Alcatraz was still a to do on my bucket list (and the irony-absolutely not lost on me), and Shark informed me of her desire to take part in a Channel Relay... And that's when it happened. I pause for a millisecond too long, and Shark took this as confirmation that I too was thinking about it, which incidentally, I wasn't, and so I seriously have no idea how this happened, but in a moment of madness, I threw caution and any sense I was born with to the wind, and found myself agreeing to join her!

In honesty after the initial shock had subsided, I thought that it would be very likely that despite agreeing to do it, it would take such a long to organise a boat, and another two people that she would either think it was too much bother and change her mind, decide that we would indeed be too old by the time it was sorted and not do it because by the time we COULD do it, things had already begun dropping off, or something that was commonplace at our age, just forget we had even had the conversation in the first place and it wouldn’t happen. 

Alas, no. I suspect that Shark was worried that if she gave me any thinking time that I would see sense and change my mind again, and I’ll admit, that as soon as the words ‘go on then’ were out of my mouth, I wanted to take them back. Sensing my sudden hesitancy, Shark was on a mission, and by the time we had finished our coffee, she had contacted Leon at SwimYourSwim, and not fifteen minutes later we had a pilot, his boat, a swim date, a team name and two more possible team members. Shark was not letting the grass grow!

At first I sat there feeling a little stunned that we were actually really doing this. Sensing my panic, Shark reminded me of all the positives of doing this swim. The guilt free food I’d be able to eat (Jaffa Cakes being top), the bragging rights, the hoodie... I told her that I was in only on the proviso that the extensive Google searches for any and all possible shark and sightings in the English Channel, since the dawn of time, came up blank.  

I had been swimming all through the summer season in my wetsuit, as I’d been training for my two way Windermere swim for most of it, and afterwards just kept wearing it out of habit and of course I was worried about the profits in Sudorcrem and Vaseline plummeting if I stopped, and whilst I didn't like the to think that I was single handedly responsible for any economic downturn they may suffer as a result of it, I needed to ditch the wetsuit that covered pretty much all of me from the ankle upwards, in favour of skins, which required the purchase of several new Channel approved swimming costumes. All of which covered not as much flesh as I was entirely comfortable with at my age.

It was necessary to swap this early as we had been advised to complete our two hour qualifying swim for the relay, if possible, as soon as the temperature dropped to below 15.5oC. That way it was done, dusted and in the bag, and if by any chance I didn’t succeed, there would be the possibility of another bite of the cherry. 

The following few weeks I spent as much time as I could at the lake, in my new costumes (there shall be absolutely not one photograph of this). The temperature dropped gradually, which I was told was a good thing in so much as that I could get used to the lower temperatures slowly, but I wasn’t convinced anything would get me entirely used to it, it was still quite a shock every time I got in, and I found that hovering round the shore line procrastinating, and trying to draw anyone that would talk into a conversation to delay getting in, did not help one bit. 

I learned quite quickly that the best ‘getting in’ strategy, for me, was to just get ready and get in. Simple as that. No faffing about. No talking. No hesitating. It was once I had reached toe level that multiple and many sweary words that I thought I had only thought, actually leaked out of my mouth. I knew this because I was reliable informed by those still in the near vicinity that the words DID come out of my mouth. I was also informed (you know who you are) that some of the words were not actually considered ‘legal’… had we been playing Scrabble, which, were I a fan of Scrabble, would have been invaluable information, and worth remembering during a game! 

Before long the water temperature dropped below the permitted 15.5oC, Shark and I (and Richard, one of our other team members) completed our 2 hour qualifier. The whole swim was, let’s say, chilly, but having 2 of my fellow team-mates with me really kept me going, along with the knowledge that absolutely all the fishes in the lake would be hibernating somewhere deep in the water, for the winter (or at least that's what I was told and choose to believe). That, along with the very large quantities of coffee and cake I had promised myself, by way of celebration, the second we were out, changed and I had stopped shivering enough to not spill any, which of course would be wasteful, and not to mention careless. 

Shark and I mixed our open water swimming with pool sessions. We had hoped to carry on swimming at the lake on a Saturday morning through the winter, even though the distances would become less and the recovery more, however this was not to be. One thing and another meant that between surprise weekends away, family commitments, bad weather and an aching toe (Me, not Shark, and yes I am aware of how pathetic this comes across, but to put it into context, I stubbed it and it REALLY hurt. A lot), we wouldn’t be able to make it to the lake for 5 weeks. 5 weeks felt too long to be thinking about getting back in again. The water by this time had dropped to near the 5oC mark. I was aware that getting back in again would be extremely uncomfortable, and possibly dangerous. Not only that, but I was also worried that I would get back in and really not love it, and after talking it over with Leon, I reluctantly decided to wait until the water warmed up before getting back in. 

And so I find myself currently on an open water sabbatical. Not because I want to be, but because I feel I’ve left it too long between cold water swims to go back just yet. This sabbatical is happening in a warm, who am I kidding? Practically boiling hot pool, but that's okay because unlike at the lake, I am permitted to shower afterwards, and the chances of getting home after being in the pool to find some type of organic matter (leaf, bit of twig, green stuff, unidentified brown thing) or other stuck to my body somewhere is exceptionally low (although there is still a very small possibility, but we won't talk about that one occasion as I'm still moderately traumatised by the whole thing...).  

And actually, it’s not so bad. At the end of the day, I still get to swim, and as the external variables are less than in the open water (temperature, tide, weather, flock of birds, exceptionally large and fast fish), I am able to chart my progress more accurately (or not, if for example I am stopped mid-way through a set to be asked if I know what the time is, or what time the life guard arrives or whether I know the temperature (yes- DAMN HOT!). 

I would be lying if I said that I don’t diss the pool at times, but it IS usually under mitigating circumstances that I do this, for example when a non-conformist swimmer gets in and swims breadths, or decides that the middle of the lane that we have been sharing is where they choose to swim. There are also other pool related dangers too, like for example possible lane rope burn, entanglement (hair balls – absolutely not mine) are some examples, and also self- inflicted injuries, like the ones that happen on the back of a terrible tumble turn, followed by the immediate inability to swim in a straight line, which result in a nasty collision with the pool steps. I came of worse FYI. 

I have been swum over, swum under, swum into, and in the interest of honesty, have myself swum over, under and into a fellow swimmer before now… and then swam into him again during the very same swim session, and to practically finish the poor man off, then kicked him when he switched lanes (on his side of the lane rope), which I suspect is actually quite difficult to achieve WITH planning, let alone without! (I’d like to add that I do know this poor man, and I am aware that this doesn’t make it one bit better, but just to let you know, he took it well, and still swims with me… on occasion when there are no ‘safer’ lanes free at the other side of the pool)!

I could go on, but despite the ‘dangers’ it’s actually not all that bad. Yes, I’d prefer to be in a lake, and yes, I realise I’m saying this – even though I know there are other and different dangers that can happen in a lake, like for example accidentally becoming impaled on a Narwhal horn, or swimming into a jetty, and I do miss the open water. A LOT! Hell, I'd even go as far as to say that I’m even looking forward to seeing Nemesis Swan again...but the pool has its benefits too, and whilst I am awaiting for spring to arrive, bringing with it some much needed warmth, you can find me poolside... waiting...

Thanks for reading. For more regular posts on my Channel Relay swim training, please look for Open Water Woman and follow me on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram.